24
Feb
2015
0

What I no longer think about…

My feet are buried in the sand, as I lay back in a surprisingly comfortable beach chair. My belly is growing and now I can feel the baby tumbling inside. Laying there, I watch Mila running up and down the sand chasing waves. In the background there is an assortment of kites that are pulling along some, very strong-looking men in their boards. In between some interrupting cloud banks, the sun is shining strong in this Caribbean Island and I find myself surrounded by family. This unexpected trip to Dominican Republic was booked with less than a month of anticipation and it has brought most of my dad’s family together. Mark and Ellen, Jaxon’s parents, heard about our last minute Caribbean venture and joined in. Making Mila a very fortunate little girl, surrounded by four of her six grandparents.

My adolescent cousins spend most of their day looking at screens, sheltered from the sun, waves and paradisal beauty. My brother, Manuel, who is soon to become a teenager spends his time conflicted between playing with our younger brother Antonio, or hanging out with the big kids doing utterly boring screen watching. Mila and her little peer, my youngest cousin, Andres spend their time learning how this world works and being amused by every little thing. As this multigenerational mingle unfolds, my mind takes me back to my younger years and the more I remember them, the more thankful I am of all that I no longer need to think about.

In a very basic level, I no longer have 18 years of traditional education ahead of me. There is no need to learn simple math, world history or navigate what my parents will or will not allow me to do. I no longer need to ponder on grades, homework or what to wear to school. I could not care less about what my peers think of me, unlike when I was a teenage girl and more importantly, I no longer need to think about boys, suffer through any breakups or worry about what number of guys I could kiss before being labeled a “whore”. I have found my companion for life and no longer need to check out those sexy kite boarders who lay in the ocean by my feet or imagine who I will end up marrying. I no longer need to worry about who I will become “when I grow up” and most importantly I no longer need to answer that question for anyone in an elevator pitch-style.

I have found out I was pregnant and no longer have to think of  “what if we get pregnant”. I have birthed a child and survived a first trimester, twice. I no longer have to worry about how my life will change once I have a kid and no longer wonder if my boobs will hang if I breastfeed my child.

Now life just seems to be unfolding as Jax and I together steer it the directions we want to go. We have grownup problems, such as paying bills, making sure we do not become too boring and a constant minimal fear that we are not succeeding at being awesome parents. It might be a mix of the ocean’s endless rhythm, fresh coconut water and the pregnancy that have my body in a hormonal low, but the questions that linger in my mind seem so much easier to deal with, then the ones I had 10 years ago. These new questions require actions and very little waiting for time-to-tell. For example, Jax and I wonder, will we be able to circumnavigate with our children? The answer is yes, if we make it work. Will we run a kickass women’s empowerment foundation? Yes, if we make it work. Will we end up living the Caribbean in a paradisal beach home? Yes. Will I ever act in a big budget film next to Eddie Redmayne? Yes, if I change the course of my life and dedicate it to acting. Will I ever write a novel? Yes, as soon as my life has less toddlers around.

Life just seems simpler, I’m thankful for that.

Tomorrow we head back to Chicago, leaving paradise and family behind. The departure would be a lot harder if we didn’t have such an exciting time laying ahead of us. We are closing on our pitch deck and soon Aaron, Delna, Jaxon and I (if I grow enough of a bad-ass personality) will head to the streets of Chicago and ask for our first round of funding for our company. It has been almost a year since we left our beach home in Saint Augustine to follow this venture, now we are ready to start showing it to the world. If we can secure some funding by April our next baby will be happily born in Chicago, if not, we are once again packing bags and moving, this time to Ecuador to birth and relax before figuring out our next steps.

mamia17 mamia mamia1 mamia2mamia18 mamia3 mamia4 mamia5 mamia6 mamia7 mamia8 mamia9 mamia10 mamia11 mamia12 mamia13 mamia14 mamia15 mamia16mamia19mamia20mamia21mamia22

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10
Jan
2015
0

Cruising the Caribbean

My body rests in a soft feathery bed as it gets carried up and dropped back down with every passing wave. The swaying motion of the ocean soothes any discomfort from my mind or body. I can for a second imagine that I am laying in my sailboat in some remote anchorage dreaming away. But we are not. Mila, Jax, my mom, Tommy, his mom, my sister, her boyfriend and Tommy’s daughter, her husband, two kids and I are being ferried around the Caribbean, along with the 480 other passengers in a luxury cruise. December 26, we left the port and as the boat rocked with the waves at night, it dawned upon Jax and I that we indeed were in very different type of boat, one that is not guided by “weather windows” and risk assessments, but by a firm, rain or shine, schedule. The first day was spent crossing the Atlantic and Caribbean waters and two nights later we had set anchor in Turks and Caicos – Puerto Rico followed, then St. Maarten, St. Barts, St. Kitts, The British Virgin Islands, Dominican Republic and the Bahamas. Although we stopped in every single one of the Islands I mentioned, we unfortunately were not able to explore the beauty of Grand Turk, St Barts or the Dominican Republic due to the combination of mildly rough water and the average age of our fellow passengers being just a bit too high to allow there safe transference to the tenders that would carry them to shore.

I never thought I would cruise these waters in a suite packed with two TVs, a king size bed and a bathroom that had separate shower and tub. The boat was equipped with unlimited hot water, food, running space, a pool, two jacuzzis, mini golf, three elevators, a casino and so much more. Yet when we docked next to other cruise ships, we looked like we could be one their tenders. I came to learn that there were boats that sailed next to us, that carried more than 6,000 people, rock climbing walls, carousel wheels and an every-night parade.

It would take a sailing vessel at least a month – maybe two – to do the journey we so promptly accomplished in 10 days. It is hard to say if I will ever again cruise these waters in such a boat, but what I can say is that it was a wonderful way to see so many places with a toddler – no need to carry our bags around, or research every hotel on every island, there were no customs forms to fill, nor island hopping flights to take and a very clean, comfy and cool room awaited us every night. It has also been a fantastic way to get to spend time with my family and let Mila get to know and love her cousins, Gaia and Oli.

On another note, the last 80 days are the official worst 80 days of my life. Far worse than I had ever spent when I was carrying tiny Mila inside. Now this baby has topped Mila’s terrible morning sickness, leaving my body in need of IV fluids, extra vitamins and a lot of emotional support. This is indeed my last pregnancy ever! Even if the later months are filled with joy and excitement, no more babies in my tummy – ever. I’m so glad we were only planning for two anyway!

And on a last note happy holidays people! Hope you all had a great time away from work and with family! Much love to all.

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15
Dec
2014
0

+1

I wrote this post about three weeks ago, but I have been feeling so miserable that even pressing the button “Publish” seemed like a chore. After accumulating too many photos in my camera without a proper post, I’ve decided to go ahead and publish it.

Okay, I’m going to let my non-jewish side shine and go ahead and tell you all a piece of news that I should probably wait to announce. I can’t help it,  I am retaliating against the status-quo, because something is generally flawed with the idea that one should wait to 12 weeks to announce a pregnancy. Yes, we are expecting again! We are ecstatic, since everything went according to plan… well not everything. The due date is July 27… Those of you who follow my written thoughts in this blog know that I was dwelling over the importance of having the last member of our family join in another month that wasn’t August, since Jax, Mila and I were all born in August. For the plan to unfold perfectly, we needed to get pregnant in November, like we did with Mila, right? – wrong. Turns out that December was the right month. Anyway, now that that issue has been taken care of, I’m glad I no longer have to ever think about it again.

So, why am I telling y’all about this baby. It’s actually as a sympathetic note to a couple of close friends of mine who have lost their babies during their first trimester. Before the twelve weeks of pregnancy, there is a 50-70% chance that a woman might miscarry. In that time, families are not supposed to get overly excited about this child. For many of us, not having this baby in our minds constantly is a struggle, since we are reminded of its presence every minute of the first twelve weeks with headaches, constant bathroom visits, a turning stomach and unstable floors. As our bodies change, it is hard to hold our minds back from traveling to 9 months in the future where we’ll finally get to meet this little being that has changed us so much.

Unfortunately, not all pregnancies reach term and in the early weeks when no one knows you’ve been pregnant, the mourning period is often faced alone. After hearing stories of how my friends struggled with the unexpected void they felt after losing a baby so early and having no one to talk to about it, since very few people knew. I decided to add a tiny grain of sand towards normalizing miscarriages and celebrating babies at their earliest form of life, since I truly believe that acknowledging the presence of the baby however small, can make it easier to deal with in case of a loss.

So here I am, telling you that there is a baby in our life. We know that there are chances that his/her presence might be brief, but we are celebrating his/her life and hoping that everything goes well with the pregnancy. I don’t think that all women should feel pressured to announce early – but I do think that recognizing both the excitement, sickness and in a worst case scenario, mourning are important to helping women through what can be a trying first trimester.

So I have exactly one month until the 12 week mark, which not only will allow Jax and I to relax a bit about losing this baby, but it also marks the end of morning sickness! Which I could not be more ecstatic about, since I have felt just completely miserable for way too many weeks in a row.

 

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24
Nov
2014
0

Mini update + Photo drop

Between work, Mila and life I have no time to write… So, I’m just going to type the tiniest update ever.

Mila has been weaned for over a month. The transition could not have been smoother for her, I struggled emotionally a bit.

Fridays are spent doing crafts with the most amazing people ever, our great friends Kelly and Rebekah. So far we have done finger painting and Christmas cookies! Hand puppets are to follow and from there the ball will keep rolling. We are having so much fun watching our girls grow and develop. I could not feel more fortunate that Mila and I have these girls in our my life.

Work is busy, very busy, but incredibly good. We now have an official office (in a basement) and five team members. Jax is a mastermind! He is juggling Invento work, which we still have some of and leading Fingo down an amazing path, I am so fortunate to be married to such an incredible human being.

 

Now a photo drop!

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13
Nov
2014
0

Would I give her away?

I hold her hand tight and look at her fingers through watery eyes.
My baby feels warm and her body shakes hard.
How can I fight this confusion inside.

Should I call for help or close the door and cry.
My baby feels warm and her body shakes hard.
I want her to shrink and fit in my insides, so I can protect her from those covered up men.

They come and they take, protecting us they say.
But not my baby and not from me, I hold her hand tight pouring with tears.
My baby feels warm and her body shakes hard.
Please help me, I cry.

I want her to smile and I want her to walk.
I wish I were the one fighting this bug.
My baby feels warm and her body shakes hard.
How can I live if she dies all alone.

How will I know that my baby is being held, when she sighs her goodbye.
I know what she has and it eats me inside.
Ebola they say will take you in days.
How can I tell a fifteen month-old she won’t suffer for long.

I close my eyes and hope there is something I can do.
I open them again and realize it is all not true.
I sit in Chicago typing away, as my baby rests peacefully just meters away.

 

I wrote this post after reading a story of a mother who lost her child to Ebola in Sierra Leone. I cannot imagine a bigger grief in my life. As the mom said goodbye with her heart in her hands, suited doctors took her fifteen month old away. My heart sunk and tears quickly filled my eyes.

Would I give Mila away? I don’t think I could ever have that amount of courage.

 

mila

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4
Nov
2014
0

The book everyone should read…

Do your Sunday evenings look a lot like you Monday mornings? 

No – Then, read this book.

Yes, but I wish they did not – Read this book.

 

Do you wish you could be doing something else, 75% of the time?

No – That’s awesome!

Yes – Read this book.

 

Do you have a huge to-do list of places and things you want to see or do and have yet to mark 5 things off?

No – Start making a list.

I already have a list and have been checking things like a boss – You are awesome!

Yes – Read this book.

 

I am not going to tell you much about this piece of literature, more than you will need a pencil, paper and a calculator (don’t worry the little math you’ll have to do will excite even those of you – like me – who hate numbers). I will also tell you that after reading this book you will need to make a choice between pretending you never read this and changing your life!

Jax and I read this over a year ago, we are still working on applying its theories and although it is not necessarily the path that we have chosen to follow with our current project, it is one that we strongly believe in.

 

tim_ferris

 

Some reviews:

 

“This engaging book makes you ask the most important question that you will ever face: What exactly is it that you want out of work and life, and why? Tim Ferriss is a master of getting more for less, often with the help of people he doesn’t even know, and here he gives away his secrets for fulfilling your dreams.”

—Bo Burlingham – Editor-at-Large, Inc. magazine

“Part scientist and part adventure hunter, Tim Ferriss has created a road map for an entirely new world. I devoured this book in one sitting — I have seen nothing like it.”

—Charles L. Brock
Chairman and CEO, Brock Capital Group
Former CFO, COO, and General Counsel, Scholastic, Inc.
Former President, Harvard Law School Association

“If you want to live life on your own terms, this is your blueprint.”

—Mike Maples
Co-founder of Motive Communications (IPO to $260M market cap), Founding Executive of Tivoli (sold to IBM for $750M)

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1
Nov
2014
0

Here for 36 hours…

Last week, we were honored with my dad’s presence for 36 hours! He came to Chicago on his way to Amsterdam, followed by Marrakesh, where he will be representing the most amazing eco-resort in the world, Hacienda Zuleta (yes, I’m a bit biased). In Morocco, he will meet top representatives from different high-end tourism destinations, network and attend exclusive parties.

Very few people are invited to this event and for the second year in a row, my dad has been one of them. As I write this post, he is probably mingling with CEOs of companies that for 52 million dollars will take you to the International Space Station, owners of hotels that will give you a room for $10,000 + a night and eating exquisite food. Yet, if you talk to my dad you would never know this about his trip, for he is as modest as one can be. So, I have to brag for him! I am so proud to be his daughter and constantly awed by what he accomplishes.

With his laugh-inducing inappropriate comments and strong personality, there are few who do not look back when we walk by. It was so incredible to have him around. Mila fell instantly in love with him and their bond felt strong. We were sad to see him leave, but glad we had some time together. We also got to see Jaxon’s parents Mark and Ellen, who joined us in the windy city for half a day while my dad was here! Getting intercontinental in-laws together is not an easy thing and these quick visits are often our only opportunity.

Life is so good right now! We get to see Mila grow every day, have decided to go for number two, the dogs are healthy and spoiled! Everyday of the week Mila gets to do fun things with her best friend Rebekah and their nanny Louise and we get to do what we love the most (relatively speaking), work together.

 

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23
Oct
2014
0

Is there ever a good time to have another child?

There are two things that have been on my mind recently… among about a hundred others. But two that consume my peace every time I watch Mila, entertain herself while I go about my day. As a recent baby-in-arms-free mom, I constantly experience an unexpected party in my head every time my daughter chooses to walk anywhere by herself, rather than being carried there. It’s not so much that I have terribly important things to do with my arms since they must be free to catch her in case of a fall, hold her tiny hand to cross the street and restrain her from chasing a squirrel that is headed towards cars, trees or people’s houses. Nonetheless, what I love about watching her toddling about, is that it symbolizes my freedom. As she takes steps into toddlerhood I gain restful nights, multitasking while she is awake, a peaceful exercising routine and cooking with both hands.

As I begin to imagine my life without a baby, a question hunts me, should we have another kid?

As the wife of a single child, Jaxon is quick to respond that “not necessarily”, but he also spent his childhood days seeing his best friend every day. As for me, I cannot imagine my days without my sister. She had an enormous impact in my life since day one and I am most definitely a better person because of her. As our parents get older, some day in the distant future, I am sure I will also be extremely thankful that I have someone to bear the responsibility with. So, giving Mila a sibling is of top priority to me. But when?

Is there ever a good time to have a second child?

As I look back into motherhood this last year, it pretty much seems like there is never a good time to have a tiny being hack your brain and rewire it to become your most precious priority. The sleepless nights, the day’s daze, the guessing what could be wrong game, as we enter Mila’s toddler years we are slowly creeping out of the most unpleasant parts of being a parent of a baby. The cuddling while nursing, the harmless dirty diapers and her first 100 + smiles are all engraved in my head, but I am glad that she now is my little awesome friend with her little personality.

So as November approaches, I have an important question to ask. Will I ever feel ready to have a second child?

Why November? Are you ready to be mesmerize by ultimate silliness – for lack of a better word. Jaxon and I were both born in August, so was Mila (unintentionally) and if possible I would like my next child to also be born in August as well. This would avoid me any future dramas about birthday jealously and who knows if the next child would end up being sensitive to the fact that he/she is not born on the same month as the rest of the family. Or maybe he/she would rather be born in a total different month! I don’t know! I hope the latter is true since we actually do not have a lot of control over when the baby chooses to come. Still I feel like we should at least try… – Yes, Mila’s independence has left my brain with enough time to consider even the most remote possibilities.

We have switched working gears now (for the most part) and cannot be happier. The future of our new enterprise looks incredibly promising and unlike our last endeavor, we look forward to every step that will be required to make it the super power we believe it can be. So, in a way having a kid now would be a distraction. On the other hand my good friend Delna is having her baby soon and Kelly, a close friend of mine and the mother of Mila’s tiny best friend, Rebekah, is also thinking of number two… so i think whether or not we want it, we’ll be getting baby fever soon.

What does the father think? Good question

Oh yeah! Forgot that I cannot make this baby by myself! Fortunately Jax already has baby fever and has had for a while, so I can call the shots. All he wants is another girl in his life, that I can’t promise.

And now a photo drop of the few photos I have taken this past month!

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7
Oct
2014
2

The G-Spot and the food cart you can start in college.

This post is going to ignore food safety regulations – so do your research before you take my advice. If you decide that you still want to pursue this idea do some more research on how your campus deals with student entrepreneurs and their crazy ideas. If you go to an University, it would probably be more complicated to get away with what we did, but if a small liberal college is where you are at, then you probably already know that putting up a food cart on a Sunday afternoon is not a problem at all.

So this is what we did:

It was late summer of 2009, Jax and I were driving a gigantic green and purple bus back from Ragbrai, a bike ride across Iowa. We were seated at the helm, it was a finicky machine to drive, plus you really felt it could break at any point and since Jax had converted it to run on veggie oil he was the only one who knew how it worked. As I fulfilled my childhood dream of sitting right against the windshield of a huge vehicle, Jax and I talked about life, which eventually brought us to the realization that unless we wanted an un-sailable sailboat to cruise the waters upon graduation, we would have to save some money to buy our boat. This meant we needed to start another “company”, one that was more profitable than Beloit General, Jax’s online general store, Beloit Tea Source, his tea business, and Yapa, my recycled-crafts line.

Towards the end of the eight-hour long drive we decided that we would use our last week of summer break to build and furnish a crepe and bubble tea cart. The Spring before we had quickly put together a cart called “The Peanut Stand” where we sold donuts and bubble tea to students. Having had tested the idea, this time we were going to go all out. With a drawing, that would insult any engineer in-hand, Jax, I and fortunate help Jaxon’s dad who is an architect started building the cart. We designed it to include a mini fridge, two crepe griddles, space to store all of the toppings, a cd player to play french music, hanging lights and a space to deal with the money.

It took us about 3 days to build the cart in Jax’s dad woodworking shop. We called a friend’s dad who we knew had closed his coffee shop and offered to buy his cream whipper, coffee thermos and syrup flavors. We read about crepe making, purchased the tapioca bubbles online, along with cups, straws and huge mixing bowls. When we got to school we painted it, assembled it and drew the terrible logo that would mean that no one knew it was “The G Spot” rather than the SPGT (pronunced by people spigot) or the Crepe Stand.

Our first night was a complete success.

We hauled the cart to the middle of a concert in campus and had a constant line from when our lights went on, at around 6:00 pm until around 1:00 am. It was a summer night, so the bubble tea sold as much as the crepes. After we had exhausted most of our ingredients we hauled it back to a basement kitchen that once, many years before, had “probably” passed FDA inspection and spent the next 3 hours meticulously cleaning every inch of the cart with bleach water. We really did not want anyone to get sick.

The next day was a Saturday, we spent most of our day buying ingredients, preparing the batter, preparing the cart and at around 9:00pm we went to our college’s main street, where all the fraternities hosted their parties. Somewhat intoxicated students would roam the street looking for food and we were in the perfect place to please them. One crepe, two crepes, some singing and a generous tips later, most student would be on their way. We stayed up until 12:00 to 1:00 am, most nights we sold out. Then we would clean for about two hours, walk to our apartment and go to bed at around 4:00 am, only to start the whole thing again the next day.  We ran Spigot G-Spot every weekend for about three months, almost every night we made a profit, but by the end of the season we were sick of Nutella, crepes and having the same conversation every weekend with the same drunk student.

Intoxicated student who bought crepes from us last weekend: Wow! Crepes! I’ve never seen you here before! This is an awesome idea!

Us: Hehe, thanks! What would you like today?

Intoxicated student who bought crepes from us last weekend: What do you recomend?

Us: I bet you’ll love Nutella with banana

Intoxicated student who bought crepes from us last weekend: Yes!! How did you know that? I love Nutella and banana.
We parked the cart in our driveway and said goodbye to the G-Spot. With some savings under our mattress and a business that had made more money than any of our previous had, we decided that we loved our weekend nights too much to continue with this venture.

So, that’s what we did… Now, this is what I would do differently:

I would replace the crepes with pomme frites. For those of you who do not know what pomme frites are, they are pretty much a snobby way of saying french fries, although some would argue that they are much longer and delicious – I agree. Anyway, drunk college student do not know that. So, I would buy two deep fryers like this one, a bunch of sauce containers like these and fill them with delicious sauces like bbq, ketchup, mayo, mustard and siracha (if you felt so inclined you could even look up some recipes and make your own – yum!). Instead of the crepe griddles I would put the fryers, make sure the cart is extremely stable and that no drunk college students can get to the hot oil, as to avoid any accidents. I would serve them up on these, add some salt and voila you are done.

Let the people get all excited about the sauces, they – for the most part – are drunk and hungry and fries are much more fulfilling and cheap than crepes, so they will eat. You would need an initial investment to buy or make the cart and furnish it, but most colleges would be happy to fund their entrepreneurs. The cleaning would also need to happen, but hey, you are running a food business you better be into cleaning if you do not want to get shut down or even worse sued.

To test out the idea you could go to Cosco or any of those destroyers-of-small-businesses stores and buy some frozen french fries, that way you minimize the amount of time you spend peeling and cutting potatoes. Once you think you have a profitable business in hand, probably the cheapest way to have a bunch of fries would be to buy them and cut them with something like this. If you are into locally sourcing ingredients, you could talk to a local farm and ask them to give a deal on a bunch of their potatoes.

Anyway, just an idea…

…for any dedicated college-aged entrepreneur who is willing to work rather than party their weekend nights. Although to be fair, you could always be the party. Put some good music on and your friends will stick around – at least until it gets cold, then move inside.

 

I am posting these against my better judgement! But I just want to show you how not legit you can look and run a business! And even make a profit!

Internal rambling:

I know the short-hair is not my best look! But I apparently lacked friends to tell me at the time lol!

Yes, the logo was that bad! Yes, Jaxon warned me that it would not read G Spot, but I won…

 

Below: The awesome veggie oil beast of a bus!

thebus

2. The Peanut Stand! (Validating our idea)

thebus2 thebus3 thebus4 thebus5 thebus6 thebus7 thebus8 thebus9 thebus10

 

Yes people did this for us! I’m so sorry dude! We didn’t know better!!

thebus11

 

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